Let’s talk about consent! (Again.)
What is consent?
- Consent is freely given.
- Consent means yes
- ONLY yes means yes
What isn’t consent?
- Consent is not ambiguous
- Consent is not coerced
- Consent is not implied
- Consent is not assumed
- Consent is not a given no matter how many times you or they have had sex before.
- Consent is not the absence of a no
How do I get consent?
- Ask! “Is this okay?” “May I do this?” “Can I…”
- Keep asking! “Still okay?” “Do you want to keep going?” “May I do this now?”
Remember: only a yes is yes, the absence of a no does not equal consent. No can come in many forms, if your partner is non-responsive, disassociated, pushing you away, trying to get you to do something else, drunk/high, under age or otherwise incapacitated: THAT MEANS NO.
Tell your friends.
Except when “No” means “Oh my God, yes”, and “red” means no.
Yeah, but once you admit what is really meant can be decoupled from the denotation of words, this “consent is black and white” shit breaks down real quick. I’ll have to find that post by eudaimonistic or social-darwin-awards that demolishes it pretty thoroughly. In the morning, when I am less drunk and capable of manipulating a computer more adequately.
But guizz r u forgeting?!?
yes means no
no means yes
peanut butter means pull my hair
Yo, if you think decrying the need for constant, enthusiastic consent is a worthy use of your time: find a better fucking hobby. Your “jokes” aren’t funny, your shit doesn’t make sense and this: “Except when “No” means “Oh my God, yes”, and “red” means no.” is an excellent example of a safe word and still qualifies as consent.
This, however, “yes means no
no means yes
peanut butter means pull my hair” is fucking stupid. Stop. Just stop.
And yeah, that “I need feminism” message could be a little clearer, but if your yes is coerced, given while intoxicated or under age, it isn’t consent.
You fucking potatoes with eyes need to get off the internet and think about your life choices.
I don’t know why this post suddenly got a rash of dumb ass reblogs with “special snowflake, anti-feminist, MRA bullshit” responses, but I am not a fan. What you’re essentially saying when you “take down” the need for consent is that rape is okay. Good for you. If you’re not already a rapist, you’re well on your way.